approaching therapy

musings as they come, and as they evolve …

you know best for your partner

without comments

Sometimes it helps to share what you think is going on, because it might relate to why you’re reacting and what you’re feeling.
I like how Terrence Real encourages us to share that: The story I’m making up in my head is….
Otherwise, when talking to your partner, I invite folks to keep to the following guideline:
Refrain from telling your partner what you think is going on for him or her and what you think your partner needs. People don’t like being told who or what they are, and what they should do.
Don’t get me wrong. It’s OK to have thoughts and opinions. They happen. You can think your partner is over-reacting, making a big deal out of nothing, is off his or her rocker, needs to deal with his or her mother issues, whatever. But just keep that to yourself.
What’s it to you, anyway?   Just talk about yourself and what you’re feeling or wanting. It’s a safer bet.

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Written by David

March 21st, 2010 at 1:02 pm

Posted in couples

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